in the movies.
First we have to move from the known or so they say.
So what do I know about kissing.
- It is a great way to bond. Scientists speculate that it could have evolved from kiss-feeding from mother to child in primordial societies. Understandable then, why kissing might be involved in bonding between couples.
- It feels great. It really does. And actually, as far as I know, no one has figured out why it feels that good. Considering how gross it actually is. One heck of a way to tell what each other’s microbes taste like.
- No 2 kisses are ever the same. Ever. Well, according to this scientist… yes, I am a scientist too. (*looking around, like why do you look surprised?). So, back to the point- no 2 kisses are ever the same. Aside from the fact that they occur in different points in space and time, they also feel different. In fact, from personal experience, no matter how many times I have kissed any given individual, no matter how many different ways it has happened, I almost can never predict what the next kiss will be like. Sometimes, it feels familiar, close to what I was expecting. Other times, it feels completely different. But never, never, ever the same as the last one or any other one, with the same or another person.
However, I have always wondered if I was the only one that thought that it was weird the way that kissing in the movies is made out to be. So, here is a couple of things I have always questioned about movie kissing (or kissing movies).
Before you start judging, much of what we “know” is learned behavior, even though it often feels natural or innate. One great way to learn, is to observe others, which is really what the movies are about. We are observing others and subconsciously forming patterns, opinions and ideas, that may subsequently modify our behavior. I am, perhaps just “learning out loud”
- Is kissing a way of telling if someone is into you? I simply cannot understand why in most movies, characters are not assumed to be into each other until they kiss. Or why those who think they are, ultimately kiss to “tell if they really are into each other”… Ok I really don’t get it. For the most part of my adult life, I have been able to tell if I like or do not like someone. Most, scratch that, all of those times, I didn’t need to kiss them to know.
- Is kissing the ultimate antidote to everything wrong? Call it kissing it to make it all better, I don’t know, but we all know at least one movie scene where everything is practically falling apart, the couple is fighting, objects and bodies and words are flying around fast. Then, one of them bumps into the other and they pause, then slowly or quickly (depending on the director) share a kiss, that turns into 2 and 3 and 4 and… you get the drift. Moments later, the couple is all smiles and apologies and everything seems to get back to normal. Please if this is real, I’d like someone to share the technique with me, because I have tried spontaneously kissing in the middle of an argument a few times and we still felt pretty pissed at each other afterwards. And those were the good ones. Other times, I have been hit or pushed away as I leaned in… for the ultimate panacea.
- Is a romantic moment incomplete without a kiss? I honestly don’t know. But that would probably be a yes if we were to ask most movie directors. I have had many romantic moments, even periods, that felt whole and complete and where we didn’t have to kiss. I am just honestly bewildered. Is it my feelings getting it all wrong?
Maybe I should just quit thinking about all this crap and just kiss as often as I can. Who cares if it makes the moment complete or incomplete or is an antidote or not or whatever else. Maybe I should just do it, because… You guessed it… It feels great!